So since I last blogged a ton has happened. First of all, Jake and I have moved out of our home in Herriman, UT. We have moved back into my mom's house in Provo.
That was in the end of May. 2 weeks after we moved in I went into Labor with my 3rd baby. He came a little early. I was 35 weeks and 6 days along. Jaxon was born with a heart defect known as Epsteins Anomoly with severe Pulmonary Stenosis. He was in the hospital for 45 days and I promise I counted every last day that he was there. I would say that those days where the worst days of my life... But how could I say such a horrible thing when every day I got to see my beautiful boy, I get to hold him in my arms and tell him that I love him. For that I will always be thankful for him. So as of the 10th of September Jaxon is 3 mos old.
I wanted to share some of my thoughts/days from Jaxon's journal as we went through his Primary Children's Hospital adventure.

~ Friday June 12th,
You are 2 days old today, and you have been so good. Your poor little heart is beating as hard and strong as it can which can be a good thing. But in your case is making you weak and tired. Today we were taking you off the ventilators and putting you on c-pap but you had other plans. sometime around 11am you stopped breathing. I cried, my heart sank when the nurses explained what was happening and why. So for Now, back on the ventilators you go!

~ Sunday June 14th,
Today dear Jaxon boy you are going to have a blessing. It's the day where we are giving you a name and a blessing. You are the first in the family that daddy gets to bless and boy is he nervous. You look so precious. I am not sure why I have been so blessed to have you apart of my life. You opened up your little peepers today and looked up at me with such sad eyes, you made my heart melt into a million pieces. You are such a special gift and I can't wait to take you home and hold you in my arms. I know that you are safe and well taken care of here and that helps me to feel calm about going home.

~ Tuesday June 16th,
The nerves we feel today are almost unbearable. Daddy gave you a blessing before heading down to the cath lab. They are going to balloon your pulmonary valve open to help release some of the pressure. Never in my life have I cried so hard. I am not sure if the blessing was more for mom and dad's piece of mind or for your well being. I think a little of both. While you were in the cath lab, mom and dad sat outside of the hospital on the benches and sobbed. We listened to your theme song ( three little birds by Bob Marley ) over and over again. You are one tough little guy! We will wait for you and with you back at your bedside.

Those are just a few excerpts from Jaxon's journal. I am not very good at writing my feelings down so I hope that you all can understand even in the slightest how I felt watching my baby being poked and tested on a daily basis.

Jaxon is now home and has been for over a month. He is being picked on still but at least it's now by his big sister wanting to hug and kiss him every hour. Kaden and Lucy are starting to recover from Mom and Dad having been gone so much. I think we are almost back to a normal routine.

KADEN, is now in the 2nd grade and already hating school. I can't believe how big he is and that he's really my kid. Am I old enough to have a 7 yr old? Cause I don't feel like I am! Kaden is trying to come into his own and figure out what he likes to do. Right now he loves to ride his bike and he likes to play Nintendo games. He loves swimming. We are thinking of putting him into wrestling and maybe basketball.

LUCY, is a typical 2 yr old who is making mommy's life miserable! She refuses to potty train and just laughs at us when we are frustrated with her over changing a poopy diaper. She is very girly and loves to get into mom's make-up.
Right now her favorite thing in the world is PINK-milk or strawberry milk.

JAXON, is as happy and healthy as an acid reflux, heart defected baby can be! He wakes up happy in the morning and ready to play and then cries all night long. He loves to eat and would probably eat all day long if mommy let him. He is almost 14lbs and growing.
Jaxon is off the oxygen but still requires his heart monitor for now. Someday soon we will be free of all monitors and machines! We find out in Dec. what our next step is!

THE NEXT BIG THING WE ARE LOOKING FORWARD TOO... is the walk for Healing Hearts.
www.intermountainhealinghearts.org
We are looking forward to meeting other people with Jaxon's same problem and to add to our healing process. It has been a long road and we are very thankful to be over our first hump.
We hope to see any family and friends there! It's only a mile, a short distance compared to what many have gone through with their "Heart" Adventures!

I am so blessed! I have 3 BEAUTIFUL kids.... My hazel eyed babies! I love them all. My world is more complete with them in it. I live everyday for them and I try to be the best mom that I can be. They continue to test me and I hope that I am meeting their expectations of me.

Today I leave you all with a thought!

WHEN LIFE GETS TO HARD TO STAND...KNEEL! Our Prayers are with you all!